Skating Fridays

Funny Things My Coach Says

grandma motorcycle

I love, love, love my coach. She’s a former Ukrainian ice dancer and used to compete on their national team. While Ukrainian coaches have a reputation for being tough (and mine definitely is), she also is a comedian at heart. I can’t tell you how much I laugh (at myself) in our weekly lessons.

During the first 10 minutes of our lesson, she has me doing some warmup exercises around the rink. We usually start with power pulls with a hop. I can’t seem to control my arms very well (I’m apparently focusing too much on the hop) so they tend to go up. She says, “You’re not riding a motorcycle! Keep those arms down!”

We’ll usually progress to something like alternating 3-turns down the rink, and she’ll say, “Come on, grandma! Move! Move! Move!” My response is usually, “This is as fast as I go!”

For some reason, I tend to bounce up and down incessantly during some exercises. My coach will say, “Your tiara just fell off! Keep that crown on your head!” When I tell her that I’ve taken mine off to she can wear it, she says with a smile, “I already have a BIG CROWN! I don’t need yours!”

This week, we were working on double pumping power pulls, and my legs were NOT in the right spot. She said, “What’s this? New hip hop move? I know you are secretly a hip hop expert! Stop moving those legs!”

Every week, she has a new saying. It leaves me in stitches, and I usually laugh so hard that my stomach hurts. But I love it. Her comments come from a place of love and caring, and it’s so fun to be able to laugh at myself. If I didn’t, none of this would be worth it.

Let’s just hope I learn how to skate faster and get off that motorcycle!




  1. March 26, 2021 / 8:49 pm

    So funny! I would be laughing until I fell down! Thanks for sharing the humor–could use a good laugh!

    • evabakes
      March 27, 2021 / 12:01 pm

      Sometimes I laugh so hard that I cry! It’s always good to enjoy what we are doing, even if it is full of mistakes.

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